


Before & After You

by soaper410



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-27
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2018-07-10 10:24:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 20,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6980425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soaper410/pseuds/soaper410
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU Modern times story about Stannis/Sansa and all their drama.  Stannis and Sansa fall for each other while he is still married to Selyse.  This is a non-linear story (meaning the chapters jump around in time). You just gotta trust me for the first 2-3 chapters until things become a tad more clear.  Additionally warnings to be added later!Hope you enjoy!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Back to the Beginning

70 DAYS AFTER  


Sansa evaluates herself in the mirror. Her copper hair is in an intricate Braavosi braid. Her makeup is minimal: pale pink lipstick and silver shadow for her eyes. Most importantly, her foundation manages to cover the dark circles under her eyes and that expensive tonic reduced the swelling of her cheeks.  


Her ice blue dress cinches at the waist and then flows out into a fuller skirt. According to the saleswoman,this color really brought out the blue in her eyes. The saleswoman said blue was "her color." It was probably just some throw away line by the saleslady so she'd buy the garment. _He_ used to tell her how much _he_ loved her in blue, but that was probably a lie. After all, everything else _he_ ever told her was a lie.  


Sansa mentally berates herself. She swore to herself she wouldn’t do this anymore. Well, at least she swore to herself she will not do this tonight. No, tonight she will not cry or blush red in embarrassment. She will pretend that she is fine, better than fine actually. She will smile and laugh and hells, maybe even flirt with a few guys right in front of _him_ and his whole family. 

Tonight would be the first time Sansa would see _him_ since that awful morning in _his_ apartment. _He_ was a Baratheon after all and of course _his_ attendance would be required at the Baratheon Ball. Still, she swore she would be here tonight. Despite what she may think of _him_ the Foundation had been generous to her ...before everything blew all to hells. Several quick memories pop into her head and Sansa feels her stomach roll with anxiety. She feels throat constrict and her eyes blur with tears. 

Margaery yells at her from the living room.  


“Coming!” Sansa yells back after blotting her eyes and giving herself one last look in the mirror.  
******  
Stannis grimaces as Robert lets another booming laugh out. There had to be at least a thousand people in the ballroom now. No doubt there were several hundred more in the lobby and under the tents outside. Every year this party got further and further out of hand. The small charity event that he and his brothers began to bring attention to their parents’ foundation had now become the social event of the year. Every year the budget grew. There were more guest, more flowers, more wine, and more courses at dinner. Most of these guests probably didn’t even know what the Baratheon Foundation did. They merely came to see and been seen. 

Stannis grinds his teeth when he sees Cersei and her damn offspring. Joffrey may be his blood but there wasn’t one likeable quality his nephew possessed. His eyes scan the room. As usual, the Martells are dressed highly inappropriately but most of the younger women here were wearing dresses which show more flesh than they hid. The only woman dressed more inappropriately is Tyrion Lannister's date. 

The trumpets sound, announcing it is time for dinner. He spots Ned Stark walking briskly from his table. He eyes follow Ned’s path as the older man walks between tables and past the musicians. Before he can figure out where Eddard is going, he feels a hand on his shoulder.  
Stannis turns to see Selyse dressed in black. Her dress lacks the sparkle and adornments that most women here are wearing. Still, Stannis supposes his wife looks nicer than she normally did. 

_“She’s_ here,” Selyse says in a hostile tone. His wife frowns; her skin sags and wrinkles as displeasure spreads over her face.  
Stannis doesn’t bother to answer. He knew _she_ would be here. Her father sits on the board of Baratheon Industries, Robert is her godfather, and up until 68 days ago she was the liaison between the hospital and the Baratheon Foundation. 

Throughout dinner Stannis keeps his gaze towards the left of the ballroom. It’s difficult to avoid half of the damn room but he can’t risk seeing her or looking at her.  
Traditionally, Stannis has given the keynote remarks. Robert is always half drunk by the time the dessert is served and Renly can never keep anything brief. This year, however, Renly manages to recognize everyone and thank the crowd in less than then minutes.  


Moments later, Stannis gives a brief goodbye to his brothers before telling Seylse they are leaving.  


*** 

Sansa grips the banister of the stairwell and sits down on the red carpet. At least here in the foyer people weren't staring at her. Tears poll in her eyes as she tries to catch her breath. 

For the first time in two months they were in the same room. Yet, he can’t even look at her, hadn’t even acknowledged her presence. Sansa wasn’t sure what she should expect but did he really have to show up with Seylse? _He showed up with his wife you idiot, which is what married people do. _Sansa exhales quietly and tries to stand up when she hears a familiar voice.__

Sansa looks between the stair railing and spots him walking out the front door. Seylse is a split second behind him. They don’t touch. They don’t even seem to interact. The ache in her core spreads to every limb of her body. Sansa leans her head against the stairwell and closes her eyes. 

She should hate him. He made her fall in love with him. He made her think that he loved her too. Then he went back to his wife, leaving her all alone. Hell, he even had her fired from the job she loved. She was the laughing stock of her medical school and Westeros society. Yet here she is, aching for him. _Sansa get a grip._

***

289 DAYS BEFORE

Stannis readjusts his tie as he walks into the hospital. The Children’s Hospital of Westeros is a renowned institution for the treatment of childhood illness and diseases. Shireen spent months in their greyscale unit when she was just a child. Stannis credited this hospital with saving Shireen's life and for the last ten years, the Baratheon Foundation had given generously to the hospital’s various projects and grants.

On the sixth floor, Stannis walks in and shakes hands with the chief of staff and several doctors. Quickly, Stannis takes a seat and listens to the various proposals for the upcoming budget. Each speaker is allotted five minutes to go over their propositions. He immediately gives his approval for studies on: the risk of Flea Bottom’s unfiltered water and the long term effects of greyscale. The last approval is for Jon Arryn to get an assistant for his work on the childhood paralysis study. 

After the meeting, Dr. Arryn shakes Stannis’ hand and thanks Stannis for his help. 

“Good luck finding someone who can keep up with you.” Stannis didn’t have friends per se but he had always felt a kinship of sorts with the doctor. Both Jon and Stannis took their careers seriously, were in marriages that felt more like obligations than relationships, and each loved their one child furiously. When it came to work, both men had high expectations of themselves and everyone else around them. 

The doctor smiles, “I actually have someone in mind. She’s highly passionate about the research we are doing and is smart as a whip. She’s finishing her first year of medical school in a couple of weeks.” Stannis nods, not because he cares about Arryn’s assistant but rather because decorum demands he be polite in these situations. Stannis piles his folders and paperwork and heads for the door but before he can leave John invites him to lunch. Stannis looks at his watch and decides he could stand a quick salad in the cafeteria. 

Arryn nods. “The assistant I was telling you about, she's already saved us a table at this little Meereen cafe around the corner.” 

Stannis feels the familiar ache in his jaw as his grinds his teeth. He didn't like cafes or lunch meetings and he hated lunch meeting with silly little girls who had somehow entranced a sixty year old man. _I really should make Robert start coming to the these meetings._

***


	2. Regrets & Mistakes

245 DAYS BEFORE 

Stannis sighs heavily as he walks into the cabin. He throws his keys into the bowl and falls into the closest chair. Stannis' lips still burn from her kisses and he can still smell Sansa on his skin. Stannis prides himself on his honor. He did not act as most men did. He stayed in the King’s army for all six years of his contract even though both his brothers had asked for an early leave. He never consumed more than a glass of wine. He did not gamble; nor did he frequent brothels. He did not waste his money on frivolity. He was not weak. He did not run away from duty or vows. He word was his oath. 

Yet, ten minutes ago, he was half naked with Sansa. 

He had asked Sansa to meet him down at the dock after dinner to stop whatever this was before it got out of hand. He and Sansa had a nice, long discussion about his marriage vows. Stannis told Sansa that he should have never let their relationship become inappropriate. Sansa said she understood, respected him, and respected his marriage. Sansa admitted that she never expected to be attracted to a married man. Her family would never approve of her having an affair. She called their relationship a “friendship” and promised that from now on they would be platonic. He and Sansa agreed they would avoid each other for the rest of their vacation. When they returned to King’s Landing, Stannis promised to avoid the hospital and the restaurants around the med school. Sansa agreed to only visit Robert or Renly when Stannis wouldn't be around. Then, somehow his hands where inside her bra. 

Stannis replays the mistakes he’s made. He should have never taken up Sansa’s invitation to “come see the office” during that initial meeting with she and Jon Arryn. When Sansa mentioned she going to use the Baratheon box at the opera, Stannis should have ensured it wasn’t the same night he was taking Shireen. He shouldn’t have called Sansa up to wish her good luck on her final exams. He sure as hell shouldn’t have casually stopped by to hear Sansa's speech on Jon Arryn’s research. He was a bloody idiot for inviting her to lunch afterwards to celebrate how well her speech went. 

He’s biggest mistake was coming to Storm’s End for the week. Robert kept going on about going to the beach for Weirdwood Day. Cersei was planning to go to the spa and Seylse would be gone to another Light Conference. Stannis didn’t even celebrate Weirwood Day. It was an old religious holiday that had been bastardized by the costume and toy industry. He had never been religious but holidays which cost more copper stars than a car payment were ridiculous. But, Stannis needed an excuse to get away from King's Landing and get away from Sansa Stark. 

Robert promised grilling out, boat rides, pool parties, and relaxation. Shireen would be able to play with Myrcella and Tommen. He’d be able spend some quality time with his daughter, Robert’s kids, and still be able to get several hours of work in each day. The one condition he requested was that he and Shireen would be able to stay in the cabin on the property. The main house was huge but Stannis wanted some privacy.

What Robert didn’t tell Stannis was along with Robert’s brood and Renly and Loras, Loras was bringing his sister and his sister’s roommate. There had certainly been no fucking mention of Sansa. Of course, Sansa hadn’t mentioned it either. She’d merely said she was going “on holiday”. Stannis knew that he should have just packed up his bags the second he saw Sansa. 

The last four days had been torture. Sansa was everywhere. She was there smiling at breakfast. She was prancing around the main house in bikinis that covered little more than a band aid. She was making jokes with Renly. She was stealing his captain’s hat and wearing it around like some walking sex dream. She was playing games with Marcella and Shireen. She was tanning with Margaery and drinking with Robert. She was every fucking where. 

No matter where he was, there was Sansa. 

Stannis tries to calm himself down. He hasn’t had sex in over a year, that’s probably why this keeps happening with Sansa. He is horny. He is flattered by her attention. He couldn’t have got a woman as beautiful and sexy as Sansa when he was 22. Now he is 41 and as clearly going through some kind of mid-life crises. Stannis wasn’t sure if this revelation made him feel better or worse. He wasn’t the kind of man who bought an expensive car or dated a woman half his age, but at least a mid-life crisis gave him an answer to why he was utterly failing at everything he prided himself on. 

Stannis decides he needs a game plan for getting through the rest of the week. Shireen was having too good of a time to leave. Tomorrow he’d feign an illness while everyone else went out onto the pontoon boat. Everyone would eat lunch on one of those uninhabited islands off the coast. It would be an all-day affair. It would put some much needed distance between he and Sansa. Yes, tomorrow he would stay behind and then he could figure out a more long term plan. 

***

Sansa readjusts her dress and runs a hand through her hair. _What in the hell is wrong with me?_ Right before dinner, Stannis cornered her near the pool. They agreed to meet down at the dock once the kids went to bed “to talk.” Sansa let Stannis go on about how she was beautiful and intelligent and delightful. Stannis admitted he was surprised by his “lack of self-control.” Then Stannis reminded Sansa that he was a married man. Then, Stannis said he was committed to his marriage and nothing else could happen.

It was a relief in some ways. Sansa never pictured herself as a homewrecker. Her parents would be so disappointed to know she had now kissed a married man multiple times. She knew how people gossiped and treated _the other woman._ Plus, Stannis wasn’t just married, he has a child. There would be no way she could break up a family. 

Even without the marriage issue, she and Stannis would have other issues. Sansa had only had sex with two people before in her life. Willas and Trystane were both her age. Stanns was so much older and mature. He was experienced and probably expected her to be too. Plus, eventually Stannis would realize she wasn’t all that interesting or smart. Sansa doubted her parents would take too kindly to dating a man who was basically two decades older than her. Stannis didn’t seem like he was her parents age, but she knew everybody else would see the age gap as a huge issue. 

She and Stannis agreed that whatever was going on between them must end. Along with the relief, there was a feeling of loss as well. She liked Stannis. He was one the only person outside of her family and doctors who enjoyed hearing her talk about medical research. He liked the opera, a passion he got from his mother. He was an expert sailor. He was a man who only spoke when things actually needed to be said. He was clueless about anything to do with popular culture, fashion, and social media. He was mature and sexy and gave her butterflies. Sansa had started to look forward to seeing him. 

Before Stannis could walk away, Sansa leaned into kiss his check. It was just the only way she thought to say goodbye. Then Stannis gave her _that_ look. Sansa knew she should have walked away but then he was kissing her. His tongue licked the seam of her lips open and began rubbing deliciously against her own. By the time they were interrupted, her shirt was around her waist and his shirt was unbuttoned. His erection was hard against her thigh and Sansa was pretty sure he had no intention of stopping. Renly and Loras apparently had a similar idea of having some alone time on the docks. Luckily, it was dark outside and Sansa and Stannis managed to tear apart and readjust their clothing before the men got within sight.

Sansa repeats all the reasons this is so wrong: He is married. He is older. He is a mistake. She remembers the saying her mother used to use for situations like this, “If he’ll cheat with you, he’ll cheat on you.” Ned and Catelyn Stark would have a stroke if they were to know what was going on. Stannis was right that this needed to end.

Sansa knows that everyone is planning to go on an all-day outing tomorrow. Sansa decides she will pretend she wants to go that spa that Cersei frequents in the nearby village or perhaps pretend Dr. Arryn needs her to review some documents. Either way, Sansa decides to avoid Stannis tomorrow by staying back at the main house.

44 DAYS BEFORE 

"I can't find my eyelash curler," Sansa yells out from the bathroom. Stannis finishes buttoning up his shirt before heading to help for the search. 

Stannis is unsure of exactly when it went from his bathroom to her bathroom. The long marble counter with the two sinks used to be empty. He used to keep his shaving kit, toothpaste and toothbrush and combs in the drawers below. The counter itself was always empty and clean.

Now there is a hairdryer and two other hair instruments are plugged in. There are four different brushes on the counter along with hair ties and clips and bows attached. There are at least twenty different colored containers places near the sink: lipsticks, mascaras, nail polish, nail polish remover, perfumes, moisturizers, face washes, and whatever the hell that purple thing in the tall glass is. It is all neatly arraigned but it’s far more cluttered than Stannis was used to. At the same time, Stannis doesn’t actually mind the way the bathroom looks now. It’s like every other part of his life with Sansa. He never realized how empty everything was until Sansa came and filled it up. 

Sansa's description of a "small black thing with a curler" doesn't really help Stannis understand what he is looking for. He picks up something with a questioning look. 

"No that's an eyeliner pencil," Sansa says as she continues to open drawers and shuffle things around. Stannis picks up another small black thing. Sansa identifies those as tweezers and continues to shuffle things around. 

He stops looking for the eye utensil and instead just watches Sansa. Her hair is up in one towel and another one is wrapped around her body. She's biting her lip, the way she does when she's nervous or trying to figure out something. A victorious yell tells Stannis that Sansa has found the missing piece of equipment. He gets a quick thank-you kiss for helping in the search before he returns to the bedroom. 

Quickly Stannis puts his socks and shoes on and picks out a tie. Sansa stops drying her hair long enough to fix his cuff links. Stannis can put his own cuff links on but months ago Sansa started doing it for him and it just became a tradition of theirs. Stannis leans in and gives Sansa a proper kiss goodbye. They go over the plan for the afternoon. Sansa will be out of class at noon. Stannis will be back at the penthouse no later than one o'clock. Then they will pack the SUV, pick up Shireen from school, and head off to the cabin at Storm’s End. 

"Love you," yells Sansa as Stannis heads to the front door. He doesn't need to say it back. He already told her several times this morning how much he loved her. Of course, that had been when Sansa was riding his cock. Immediately, Stannis turns around and walks back to find Sansa putting on the necklace he gave her. He leans into the crock of her neck thankful she’s still just dressed in terry cloth. Stannis whispers that he loves her before sucking on the tender skin. Sansa eyes meet Stannis’ in the reflection of the mirror. They share a knowing look as Stannis leans down and kisses her neck again. 

When Stannis heads for the front door again, he cannot stop his mouth from showing the smallest hint of a smile. 

9 DAYS AFTER 

“Loras refuses to have sex with me and it’s all **your fault** ,” Renly yells as he slams the office door behind him.

Stannis huffs out of frustration an annoyance. He is already having a gods-awful day without discussing his brother’s sex life. “Renly I don’t have time for whatever nonsense you are going on about.”

Renly clinches his jaw and it reminds Stannis of himself when he gets angry. “Margaery made Loras promise not to have sex with me until I can figure out why you ended things with Sansa.” Over the last year, Stannis has become more familiar with the Tyrells. They have very strange ideas of sibling loyalty and they tend to share far too much information with other members of their family. 

“Even by Tyrell standards that is ridiculous. Whatever is going on in my personal life has nothing to do with you.” Stannis knows Renly won’t let this go easily. 

Stannis gives Renly the story that he’s rehearsed in his head. Sansa was a passing fling. Stannis knows there is no future with her. She was pretty and exciting but it wasn't long term. He is now re-devoted to his marriage. He will not discuss his mistakes any further.

Renly rolls his eyes. “Re-devote is not a word. The fact that you are using made up words tells me that you are rattled.” Renly informs his brother that Sansa has been crying her eyes out for the week and a half. Stannis tries to remain calm but feels the constant ache in his chest worsen. He hates to think of Sansa crying, especially over him. Renly tells Stannis that Sansa isn't eating very well and she hasn't cracked a book since the breakup. Stannis knows that Sansa has exams coming up. She needs to focus on that. Whatever else Renly says is lost as Sansa consumes Stannis’ thoughts. Stannis does hear Renly call him "an asshole for ruining Dr. Arryn's project." Eventually, Renly leaves in a huff. 

Stannis walks over to his desk and puts his head in his hands. He takes his keys out and unlatches the locked drawer in his desk. Stannis pulls out the black and white pictures of he and Sansa from the photo booth. He rubs his thumb over the pictures and feels a single tear run down his face. He wipes it away with the back of his hand before placing the photos back in the drawer and relocking it. 

He knew ending things would Sansa would hurt like hell but he hadn’t prepared himself for this. He dreads going home at night. He sleeps in one of the guest rooms. It just too hard to fall asleep in their, correction _his_ , bed. He feels so lost and lonely right now and all he wants to do is talk to her. He misses ordering takeout for two. He hates how his bathroom counter is completely bare. He loathes that his closet has plenty of room in it again. He misses the magazines with the terrible advice. He misses hearing her laugh. Stannis still catches himself getting excited about leaving work only to remember she won’t be at home when he gets there. Shireen keeps asking to go to the beach house for the weekend but Stannis can’t bear going there right now. Truth be told, Stannis isn’t sure he’ll ever be able to bring himself to stay in the cabin again. 

Stannis walks down the hall to Robert’s office. Thankfully, his brother is off doing gods knows what with gods knows who. Stannis takes the bottle of scotch and unscrews the top. He fills the glass a third full then throws back the whole damn thing. 

Selyse was moving back into the Penthouse tonight. At that thought, Stannis pours some more scotch into the glass. 

  
***

Sansa sniffs as she throws another picture frame in the box. Loras suggested taking everything that reminded her of Stannis and burning it. Sansa wasn’t ready for that yet but decided to at least put everything away. Stannis always hated posing for pictures but she’d managed to collect at least a few dozen of them together. Next in the box was the menu from the first night Stannis cooked dinner for her, the captain’s hat, the program to the Westerosi opera, the compass, a yellow scarf, the necklace he’d given her, and a dozen or so other items. Sansa clicks the box closed and breathes out slowly. 

She has to go to the library and study. She really should have been studying for the better part of the last week but her heart and mind just haven’t really been in it. In some ways, this still feels like some horrible dream. It still makes no sense. How does everything change in a blink of an eye? Stannis and Seylse barely saw each other before Sansa and Stannis began their relationship. Stannis had even confided in her that he had never been in love with Seylse. They married out of some backwards idea that it as “time” to do so. By the time Sansa came along, Selyse was more involved with that religious cult than she was with her own husband or child. Even when Stannis filed for divorce, Selyse’s main concern was being able to financially keep up her obligations to the Lord of Light. Now all of a sudden, Stannis was in love with his wife and wanted to work on his marriage. 

Sansa throws her anatomy book in her bag and grabs a couple of pens. People already thought she was some home-wrecking floozy who'd bedded Stannis for his money and influence. Now she was a home-wrecking floozy who couldn't even hold onto her sugar daddy. She was apparently pathetic at being pathetic. She has exams coming up. Whether anyone else believed it, Sansa had gotten her good grades thus far by her own hard work. She isn't going to let anything, including Stannis, stop her from succeeding.


	3. Diagnosis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I divided this chapter into 2 because it kept getting longer. Will post next update on Friday morning!

87 DAYS BEFORE

Sansa runs out of the library and quickly walks down the stairs. She practically sprints the next two blocks. She hurriedly passes the burn center and the women’s wing of the hospital. Stannis had been brief on the phone. Shireen fell off the monkey bars, the principal was concerned it was a broken and out of an abundance of caution he was taking Shireen to the hospital. Still, Sansa can’t help but run into the automatic sliding doors of the emergency room. 

Sansa hurries to the desk under the “Check-In” sign. A nurse quickly escorts Sansa back to a private room off to the side of the emergency room. Sansa assumes the private room has more to do with Shireen’s last name and less to do with her injury. Still, Sansa doesn’t fully exhale until she sees Shireen sitting on the bed. 

The young girl looks pale is holds her arm awkwardly but other than that she’s appears fine. Sansa and Shireen both give their “thank yous” to the assistant principal who drove Shireen over to the hospital. Once the two are alone, Sansa assures Shireen that her father “is on his way.” Shireen swears she was just playing on the monkey bars and fell. The little girl has tears in her eyes and her lip trembles in fear. Sansa reassures Shireen that nobody is mad at her. It was an accident and the important part is that she's okay. Sansa brushes Shireen’s hair out of her eyes. 

The nurse begins to stretch and bend Shireen’s arm. Sansa can tell Shireen is in pain but the little girl doesn’t cry or complain. The nurse makes notes on her chart and turns back to Sansa. "Looks broken to me but we'll get X-rays to confirm it." At that, Shireen’s brave façade crumbles. As soon as the nurse leaves, Shireen begins babbling about an ugly cast and how she won’t be able to swim for a whole month and a half. 

To cheer her up, Sansa promises Shireen can have whatever she wants for dinner. Shireen’s eyes light up when she asks for Sansa to make macaroni and cheese as well as twice-baked potatoes and Pentos rice. Shireen can’t decide between lemoncakes and raspberry tarts. Shireen becomes serious for a moment when she worries that her father will have nothing to eat. Stannis generally eats salads, meats and fish. Three carbohydrates and a dessert is like Stannis’ food nightmare. Sansa shakes her head, “he didn’t break his arm today either. He’ll make do.” They start talking about what color Shireen is going to pick for her cast. It’s decided if there is a cast, it will be green. Stannis arrives soon. He tries to appear calm but it’s obvious he’s worried. He kisses Shireen's forehead and began a visual inspection of his daughter's injuries. "Broken?" he asks to both women. 

Sansa nods, "The triage nurse believes so. We are waiting for Shireen to go to X-ray.” Ten minutes later, two orderlies come to escort Shireen down to the radiology department. Shireen insists to both adults that she will be fine without them. Sansa can’t help but smile. _She's trying so hard to be brave just like her father._

Left alone, Stannis envelopes Sansa in a hug. She happily sighs as she wraps her arms around him. She loves his long hugs. He’s so strong and she always feels so protected when he’s wrapped around her. He whispers a "thank you" for coming. Sansa doesn’t need a “thank you”. There is no place in the world she would rather be right now. Over the last months, Sansa has comes to care for Shireen separate and apart from her feelings for Stannis. They talk for a few minutes. Stannis insists Sansa head back to the medical school. She still has one lecture left and he doesn't want her to miss it. They work out a compromise. Sansa will go back to the medical school for her lecture but will skip her usual hour or so of studying afterwards. Stannis grimaces when his cellphone starts buzzing. It’s Selyse. 

Sansa excuses herself from the hospital room and goes to get some coffee. When she returns a few minutes later, Stannis is putting his phone away. He’s clinching his jaw and grinding his teeth in annoyance. Apparently it is Stannis’ fault that Shireen broke her arm during recess. 

Sansa leaves the hospital ten minutes before her lecture starts. She’s reluctant but knows Shireen is fine. She gets a quick kiss from Stannis and tells Shireen to text her if she needs anything. 

Three hours later, Sansa walks into the penthouse with two bags of groceries. Shireen is asleep on the couch and Stannis is sitting at the kitchen table with several folders around him. He looks tired but he does his best to smile at her. Stannis and she sneak off to the kitchen. He grumbles about too many starches but ends up eating several spoons full of mac and cheese. 

Stannis tells Sansa about the casting process. He paid an extra bronze dragon to get a waterproof cast. Selyse called again while Sansa was in class. Selyse isn’t sure that Stannis is “taking care of _her_ daughter.” 

Soon afterwards, Shireen wakes up. The two ladies eat their fair share of carbs while Stannis nibbles on an egg salad. 

***

2 DAYS BEFORE 

Stannis walks into Jon Arryn’s office with a slight grimace. He had a lot of work to do today. Robert’s new piece-on-the-side was taking up more of Robert’s time than usual. Sansa was studying from home today and Stannis was hoping he’d be able to check on her around lunchtime. For whatever reason, Sansa was always horny when she studied. Stannis assumed it was a combination of Sansa wanting a distraction from her studies and her inability to resist him. He smirks at that thought and considers just cancelling whatever this meeting was about. 

Stannis walks into the office and shakes hands with the doctor. The man seems somber and doesn’t start with small talk like he usually does. Jon shares that he has been very busy with his paralysis project. Stannis is aware of that; after all, Sansa is his assistant. Jon begins telling him about Dr. Tarly has started working on the greyscale project and has been collaborating with several specialists from Essos. 

“The Essos’ doctors are releasing a very small study for peer review,” explains Jon as he picks up a brown folder and hands it to Stannis. “The topic is the recurrence of greyscale in those who had the infection as children.” Stannis feels his pulse quicken. _Shireen. This is about Shireen_. The study was small. Jon keeps putting an emphasis on “small study.” He adds phrases like, “less than 20 people were in the research pool,” “early stages in the research process.”

Eventually Stannis interrupts. His heart beats fast as he asks the question he doesn’t want the answer to. “What does the study say?” 

Jon gives Stannis as sympathetic look. “Out of the 19 subjects, 17 had a recurrence of greyscale. 14 of the 17 subjects who had a recurrence in the study suffered from a lethal re-occurrence.” _Lethal? 14 of 17?_ Jon gives him some reassurances. Shireen’s scars are less pronounced than most of those in the study. Shireen’s greyscale occurred when she was twenty-two months old. Most of the subjects in the study were at least five years old when they were first infected. 

“What age?” asks Stannis as he interrupts Jon again. 

Jon looks down to the floor and noticeably swallows. His voices lacks the clinical tone. “The symptoms which lead to the diagnosis of reoccurring greyscale were first noted between eight and ten years after the first occurrence. _Shireen wasn’t two when she was diagnosed. She’s ten now._ Stannis quickly sits down unsure if his legs will hold him. 

“What symptoms?” asks Stannis. His mouth is dry and he isn’t sure how he’s actually forming the words to these questions. 

Jon pauses again. He tries to reassure Stannis that just because symptoms exist, it doesn’t mean Shireen has a re-occurrence and even if it does, it isn’t a death sentence. _For 14 out of 19 patients it was a death sentence_. Jon begins to list the symptoms. “Obviously the most telling is the grey scales and cracking of otherwise healthy skin but some patients never exhibited those in their second disease. In most patients, there were significant loss in either the taste or smell sense, brittle bones, a grey or brown discoloration of the whites of their eyes, and internal bleeding.” 

Stannis listens as Jon goes through the study in more depth. Stannis’ brain seems to shut down. Everyone knew that if a person survived greyscale, they could never catch it again. Jon doesn’t offer any definitive explanations. “As technology and medicine advance, diseases and infections do too. It is possible greyscale has mutated. The main two physicians in the study believe greyscale never left the bodies of these patients. Rather, through treatment the greyscale went dormant. Then the symptoms are assumed to be other diseases or issues as the medical community has always believed it to impossible to get greyscale a second time.” 

Stannis looks at the floor, unable to think of anything except how uneven the tiles are. _Someone should really fix those._ Jon explains that most survivors of greyscale are outcasts with little to no financial support. Most cultures consider greyscale to be a curse. In some areas of the world, those afflicted with greyscale are shipped off to colonies or institutions. As such, many greyscale victims live in less than ideal environments. “Their symptoms may have appeared to be drug related or attributed to their unsanitary lifestyle. But those are just theories at this point. ” 

Stannis’s head shoots up, “Shireen broke her arm a few months back. She fell off the monkey bars and the teacher even said it wasn’t a bad fall.”

Jon shakes his head. Children break bones all the time and one incident does not necessarily mean anything. Stannis’s eyes go back to the floor. Last weekend, Stannis noticed Shireen was able to eat some of Sansa’s spicy rice from the Meereense restaurant. Perhaps her sense of taste was lessening? Stannis thinks back to the last several dozen conversations he remembers with Shireen. His eyes dart across that damn blasted crooked floor. He doesn’t remember to thank Jon for the information as he walks out. 

5 DAYS AFTER

Stannis grimaces in pain. His jaw aches and has turned from red to a mixture of bluish-purple. His left eye is still swollen but at least he can open it without the use of his fingers. Shireen hands him a small bag of ice and looks at him sympathetically.

Stannis’ heart aches as he looks at his little girl. She misses Sansa too and is just as confused as everyone else is by this breakup. She seems to be angry at him but unable to muster up enough courage to tell him. She probably feels sorry for him; after all, getting punched by Ned one day and Robert the next was bad enough. 

Shireen also seems a bit disturbed by Selyse’s reappearance in King’s Landing. The three of them had dinner the night before in the penthouse. It was awkward and forced but he supposed it could have been worse. Selyse kept her babbling about the Lord of Light to a minimum and only made two disparaging comment about Sansa. 

He walks into the living room. It’s been four days since he’s seen her last. His stomach turns when he recalls the words he said to Sansa the day after their official breakup. Stannis hurt her so deeply that he is sure Sansa will hate him forever. He certainly willnever forgive himself. Then he took away the paralysis project completely. Renly called him “vindictive and heartless” for canceling the paralysis project. Catelyn’s names for him had been much worse. 

Stannis walks out onto the terrace and grimaces. The air is unusually cool and his face still aches terribly. He looks towards the east, taking in the dark shadows of the bay. He isn’t sure how long he stands there but eventually Selyse comes out to check on him. She tells him he needs a coat. Stannis grumbles he’s fine. Their conversation is brief. Selyse will fly back to Dragonstone tomorrow to pack and tie up some loose ends. She will move into one of the guest rooms for now. 

They reaffirm that they won’t tell Shireen about a possible reoccurrence of greyscale until they are sure that Shireen has it. Until that time, both he and Selyse will put their personal feelings aside and give Shireen the supporting family unit she deserves. 


	4. In My Head

271 DAYS BEFORE 

Stannis readjusts his bowtie and brushes non-existent lent off his jacket. He turns to face his daughter. She’s wearing a lilac dress. The dress is nice and age appropriate. Her hair lays flat against her face and she wears no jewelry. Perhaps if Selyse was around more, Shireen would know about hair things or care about her toe nails being ridiculous colors. Of course, Stannis loves Shireen just the way she is, but he can’t help but wish she had more of a maternal role model. He had no clue what women carried in their pocketbooks or when girls started wearing makeup. Still, Shireen looks quite fine and grown up and she will probably let him know when she wants to wear makeup and get pocketbooks.

Stannis and Shireen make their way to the opera. Stannis feels a tad disappointed to see the rest of the opera box is empty. Robert generally comes at least twice to each show: once with Cersei and the children and once with whatever girlfriend he was seeing. Renly and Loras typically come to at least one show. When business associates were in town, they would come to the opera too. A few minutes before the curtain is to drop, Sansa walks in. She gives a small wave to both he and Shireen and has a seat beside Shireen. He had causally offered Sansa a seat any night of the week at the opera, just telling Sansa that she could call his administrative assistant and pick up a ticket. He didn't know she was coming tonight. 

Stannis finds himself focusing less on the story than he usually does. Instead, he keeps looking over Shireen’s head towards Sansa. He can only see her profile but can tell her eyes light up when the hero comes on stage. _She probably finds him handsome._ Intermission comes soon. The usher brings wine for Sansa and candies for Shireen. Stannis gets water and pretzels for himself. The three of them talk a little about the first act. Both adults are impressed that Shireen is able to understand the act. Stannis gets more wrapped up in the second act. He only glances over at Sansa occasionally. Her earrings glitter in the soft light and she laughs softly at a pun in the aria. Her plum colored dress contrasts beautifully with her hair and skin and occasionally she bites her lip in concentration . 

The hero dies tragically when he’s mistaken for the evil villain. Sansa cries and even Shireen seems upset. Sansa mentions that’s she needs to get hurry home because she's hungry . Stannis isn’t sure why he offers to go to one of the nicer restaurants for coffee and a dessert. Both Sansa and Shireen nod in agreement and they quickly leave the theater. Shireen's face lights up when she’s allowed to order coffee and raspberry sorbet. Stannis shares that his love of opera comes from his mother. His parents were always major sponsors of the Red Keep Opera House when they were alive and he and Robert are both patrons. Sansa listens intently as Stannis describes the first opera he went to. Sansa smiles sweetly imagining Stannis as a little boy in a baby tuxedo. She bets even at the age of five he was serious. 

Stannis catches staring at Sansa several times while they wait. When she smiles, a sense of pride fills his belly. 

Their desserts arrive along with their drinks. Sansa gets a piece of lemon cake which she declares is “her favorite.” It surprises Stannis that she likes something with a bit sourness to it. He just assumes that Sansa should like only very sweet treats. Stannis thanks the waitress for his plain fruit plate. They fall into a comfortable conversation. The caffeine in the coffee affects both he and Shireen. They are more both talkative than usual. Shireen discusses the book she’s just finished. Both adults remember the basic plot of the book and they talk about their favorite characters and the plot twist near the end. Sansa steals a strawberry from Stannis’ plate. It should annoy Stannis but for some reason he doesn’t seem to mind. Sansa talks about the speech she is giving for potential donors to further the paralysis research. She makes an offhand remark that Stannis should come to her speech. Too quickly he responds back saying he’ll try. She smiles again and he feels hot. Shireen throws him an odd look. 

It occurs to Stannis later that their restaurant outing was completely inappropriate. They spent nearly two hours together, late at night, in public, with only his child to chaperone. Still, he couldn’t bring himself to actually regret going to the restaurant. 

270 DAYS BEFORE

Margaery cocks her head at Sansa. “So you went on a date with Stannis Baratheon and his child?” 

Sansa rolls her eyes as she brushes her hair into a ponytail. It wasn’t a date. He is married. He is being nice to her. She is just some silly little girl to him. He is being nice to a family friend’s kid and they happen to come into each others spheres due to his hospital sponsorship, and lunch, and twice when he's stopped by the office to see Jon Arryn, and now at the opera. 

Sansa walks into her room and comes back out wearing a sports bra and long black pants. Her tennis shoes are on and she searches for her earphones. Margaery asks Sansa what she is doing. Sansa rolls her eyes. It’s very obvious she is going for a jog. Sansa ran a lot during her university years but had fallen out of the habit once she moved to King’s Landing. Medical School took up so much more time and there weren’t many running trails in the city. Plus, she really never liked running. It was boring and hot.

Margaery shoots Sansa a knowing look. Sansa shrugs, “Okay, so Stannis mentioned that the gardens at the Keep had a four mile circle. But it isn’t like I’m just running because Stannis encouraged me to do it.” Margaery makes and knowing sigh and walks away. 

Sansa quickly heads to the old grounds of the Red Keep. Stannis was right. The gardens were beautiful and the trail was clearly maintained. As Sansa runs, her mind wonders to Stannis again. He was quite handsome in that tuxedo the other night. She’d only ever dated two guys and neither one of them appreciated the arts at all. Sansa rolls her eyes at the thoughts of her ex-boyfriends and comparing them to Stannis. _Margaery is right. I am being an idiot._

Four miles later, Sansa huffs out a deep breath. Despite Stannis’ insistence that running was calming and a great exercise, Sansa realizes running still sucks as much as it ever did. Sansa turns the music off of her phone and shoots Stannis a text message telling him that she still hates running. 

She gets a quick text message back insisting perhaps she is doing it wrong, “after all it is both great exercise and a good way to take in the gardens of the city.” 

Sansa smiles to herself. He’s always so serious but in an oddly cute way. 

*** 

2 DAYS BEFORE

Stannis feels the weight of the world on his shoulders as he walks to his car. While he’d was never in love with Selyse, he does care for her well-being. They lived together for nearly a decade. She is Shireen’s mother and she suffered three other miscarriages for him. Over the years, she’d suffered depression, hormone imbalances, physical pain, and emotional scars due to her pregnancies. 

She’d been a good mother to Shireen albeit instead of staying by Shireen’s bedside as a toddler, she’d turned to religion. Stannis held Shireen’s hand and willed her to live. Stannis made every doctor and nurse check on her twice as often as they planned. Meanwhile, Selyse would pray by her beside or go to the Sept. She spent hours lighting candles and sitting in stained glass buildings begging the gods to spare Shireen’s life. It took him years to understand that Selyse did just as much as he did for Shireen, they just did very different things. 

Selyse miscarried the last child when Shireen was four. Soon after, she abandoned the Religion of the Seven for the Lord of Light. Over the years, she became more fanatical in her beliefs. Perhaps if Stannis had been more supportive of her or a better husband, she wouldn’t have turned into such a religious zealot. 

As Stannis pulls his car onto the King’s Highway, he lets out a deep breath. Selyse did not take the news well that Shireen may become sick again, not that he expected her to.

At first, Selyse had cried a few tears. She asked questions about timelines and symptoms. He even put an arm around her as a sign of comfort. It had been slightly awkward to touch Selyse, but in the last year, he’d become better at showing affection to others. Then she begin praying and yelling to the Lord of Light. She blamed his relationship with Sansa as being a dark influence and causing Shireen's illness. It made no logical sense but soon Selyse began yelling at him and lighting matches.

There is nearly a four hour ride ahead of him and all he could think about was Sansa and Shireen. There were reasons Stannis had been so reluctant to file for divorce years ago. Shireen deserved a family and a father who honored his commitment to her mother. He didn’t want Shireen to feel ostracized or more different than she already did. Shireen’s facial scars and her shyness made it hard enough for Shireen as it was. Putting Shireen through an inevitably public divorce seemed rather idiotic as Stannis never believed he’d actually find another relationship. 

Sansa and Shireen are close. Despite not being her mother, Sansa fills a maternal role with Shireen. Shireen is starting to wear that clear lip gel and is starting to wear clothes that seem more like a young lady than little kid’s apparel. Shireen enjoys discussing the books she reads with Sansa and they both love cooking and baking together. Still, Sansa is not Shireen’s mother and Shireen is not her responsibility. 

His thoughts move to Sansa. She’s twenty three years. She’s a second year med student. Next year, Sansa will start her rotations for medical school. Every six weeks, Sansa will work in a different department in the hospital. There will be some rotations in which Sansa works forty hours a week and others she will spend up to sixty hours on the job. Sansa loves Shireen. She is an amazing quasi-stepmother to his child. She sure as hell didn’t sign up to become an adult responsible for a very sick child. Stannis thinks back to the months he spent at Shireen’s bedside. It was physical exhausting of course, but the emotional toll was much worse. He couldn’t ask that of Sansa, he wouldn’t ask that of Sansa. If Stannis let her, Sansa would be there every step of the way. She’d come to doctor’s appointments and treatments. She would forgo sleep and studying to sit beside him in some hospital room. Additionally, greyscale is highly contagious. He would die for Shireen in a second but he couldn’t ask Sansa to risk her own health and well-being for his child. He could never live with himself if anything happened to Sansa because of him. Stannis shakes his head as he thinks about Sansa. When Ned Stark found out about his relationship with Sansa, there had been a lot of threats made. He swore to Ned that he would never hurt Sansa, never embarrass her again, and always encourage her to continue her education. Ned's words echo in the quiet of the car. 

As the night sky turns dark, Stannis grips the steering wheel. The idea of giving up Sansa seems unreal. Ironically, everything about Sansa seems unreal. She's too beautiful, too sweet, too perfect. Losing Sansa would be one of the most difficult he things he would ever go through, but he never deserved her to begin with. Perhaps there was some consolation in that. 

For just a second, Stannis lets the gravity of what he’s about to do sink in. He feels sick to his stomach and his chest aches in an unpleasing way. He never expected Sansa to come into his life at all. She was this beautiful creature who found him interesting and romantic and sexy. They had sailing trips and walks on the beach, they had dancing on the outdoor terrace and long kisses for no real reason. 

The next two hours are full of Stannis rehearsing how this will go. He will get her to understand that things just aren’t working out. He’ll claim that she’s wonderful but he’s just jumped into this relationship too fast. He will say she’s fantastic and sweet but he’s just not ready for another lifetime commitment. He might say something about the divorce taking too much time. If that doesn’t do the trick, Stannis will go into how busy he is at work and how busy she will be with rotations. 

He grips the wheel tighter and rolls down the window for no discernible reason. He wouldn’t have her again. He’d never hold her again or make love to her. He’d never make her laugh or be the reason she was nearly late to work. He couldn’t just stare at her or make fun of the green goop she puts on her face. 

Stannis never anticipated Sansa being anything other than some fantasy. Soon, she’d be nothing more than a memory he didn’t deserve. In the end, it would be better for everyone. She can move on her life and find a man who…Stannis can’t even finish the thought and instead turns on his radio. He doesn't listen to music generally but anything is better than the sounds in his own head.

***

75 Days After 

Sansa walks into the geriatric unit of hospital. This rotation is a mixed barrel so to speak. She likes that it is simply forty hours a week, no overtime or night emergencies. The downside is nothing every exciting ever happens, every patient seems to have a dozen ailments, and most of them seem very lonely. 

Sansa does find she likes listening to old war stories and hearing about how things were back in the olden times. Her favorite patient is Betha, a sweet 87 year old woman, who used to sing in the famous Mockingjay Night Club. Her stories of various love affairs and adventures are a fantastic escape from her usual moping about. 

Sansa soon heads to visit other patients, checking their vitals and get tips from the real doctors. Sansa gets done right at 5:00 and heads for the parking lot. As she heads for the car, Sansa spots a familiar luxury vehicle pull into a spot right beside hers. She hadn’t seem in two and half months and now she’s running into twice in one week. _Great. He’ll probably have Selyse with him too. That will make it all the more special._. Sansa tries to get to her car but Stannis is already jumping out of his car before Sansa can get away. Sansa grips her pocketbook tighter and does her best to look unaffected by Stannis’ presence. 

“Hello Stannis,” Sansa manages to get out. 

Stannis puts his hands in his pocket. It’s one of the things he does when he’s nervous. He answers that he’s fine and ask her how she is doing. He's polite to her as if she's some stranger on the sidewalk. 

“Great,” says Sansa all of sudden feeling a wave of anger wash over her. The words he said to her the morning after their breakup still haunted her. Yet, here is standing in front of her acting as if they barely knew each other. 

Sansa readjusts her blue scrub top and continues her sentence. “Great. I’m great.” Her voice is slightly lower than it usually is and lacks the warmth Stannis is used to. “You know my ex-boyfriend called me an easy lay and a fun waste of time before he went back to his wife but other than that I’m great.” 

The pupils in Stannis eyes grow wide and his mouth opens slightly. _Those were not my exact words._ Sansa raises an eyebrow thinking Stannis sure as hell needs to look a lot more sorry than he does right now. The two stare at each other for a few seconds before Sansa turns to leave. 

Stannis stands there as Sansa’s car drives off and replays the conversation in his head. Eventually, he gets back in his car and heads back to the Penthouse, no longer having the energy to meet with Robert and the Chief of Staff about the Baratheon Fund. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter is shorter than I anticipated. Kept trying to get one scene right and it wasn't working, so hopefully it will appear in the next chapter. The story is liking changing from M to Explicit soon so warning for adult content & thanks for all the comments. Should update on Friday!

260 DAYS BEFORE

“Scrabble?” Sansa snorts out before choking on her lemonade. She politely wipes her mouth with the napkin and shots a glance at Stannis. His frown grows longer and she realizes she hurt his feelings. Sansa tries to spit out an apology but instead laughs harder. What adult’s favorite childhood game is scrabble? She laughs a little more and then presses her lips together trying in seriousness. Stannis looks a tad embarrassed and that is the last thing Sansa wants. Without thinking, Sansa places her hand over Stannis' hand to try and comfort him. They share a gentle smile together when his thumb strokes the back of her hand. If either of them think of pulling their hand away from the other, they don’t act on it. It’s comforting and strangely exhilarating at the same time.

Sansa blushes slightly when she finally removes her hand. It is more out of necessity than desire as the phone at her office is ringing. The conversation is quick and she hangs up after giving a few “yes” and “no” answers. Sansa apologizes but insists she has to go up and meet Jon Arryn in the conference room. She closes her takeout plate and thanks Stannis for lunch. He shrugs. It really is nothing. He simply sent her a text that Byrnn Rivers was impressed with Sansa's speech the day before. Sansa responded with a joke about Jon Arryn seeing it differently and making her work through lunch. Stannis being the ever chivalrous man he was, showed up thirty minutes later with two salads, a bottle of water, and a large cup of lemonade

***

“Where were you?” asks Robert as he bounds into Stannis’ office. Robert begins talking about some “busty new gal working for Renly.” Stannis frowns as his brother holds his hands up and makes obscene gestures. Stannis barks at Robert to leave so he can do work. Robert’s eyes gleam as he sits down on edge of Stannis’ desk, clearly having no intention to leave. Robert begins telling Stannis that he went down to properly introduce himself to the large breasted woman when he overheard two other interns speaking. Stannis has work to do and discussing office gossip and Robert’s newest conquest is not his idea of having a productive afternoon.

Robert's smile widens and he leans in a little closer. He almost looks like a young kid, full of glee. “They were talking about you!”

“Me?” asks Stannis.

Robert’s smile widens. With excitement, Robert shares that the two interns said Stannis is seeing a pretty redhead. Stannis’ eyes widen and despite his attempts to seem unaffected, he cannot seem to hide the truth from his brother. Before Stannis can deny it, Robert continues. Stannis has been seen in public with this redhead multiple times including at a restaurant yesterday afternoon. Stannis swears that the female is just a friend.

“You have no friends,” laughs Robert as he rubs his hands together gleefully. Stannis’ usual frown deepens. Robert asks for her name twice before Stannis demands Robert leave. Stannis grinds his teeth in irritation. Robert guesses they’ve only fucked a few times seeing as how Stannis perpetual bad mood hasn’t changed much.

Stannis stands up from his desk quickly, so much that his chair rolls back and hits the wall behind him. In a quiet but firm tone, Stannis tells Robert to leave and not speak of it again, he has done nothing inappropriate with anyone. Robert rolls his eyes and tells Stannis he will drop the topic for now but Robert promises he’ll get to the bottom of this. He makes a pun about bottoms as Stannis pushes him out the office door. Robert yells back inviting he and Shireen to Storm’s End for the Weirwood Holiday.

Stannis slowly walks back to his desk. There is no way that Robert will drop this. The entire secretarial pool of the administrative floor will be grilled by the end of business today. Robert is probably calling Renly in to help him investigate right now. He runs through the times that he and Sansa have been seen together in public. There were only a handful of occasions and none had been improper; still, Stannis knows how things are misconstrued.

It probably doesn’t help that Stannis never went out in public with anyone but his family. Sansa was a young beautiful woman and everyone this side of Essos knows that Robert sleeps with anything. It would make some sense that wagging tongues might assume that he shared that Baratheon trait. Stannis grimaces at that thought. He’s honored every vow he’s ever taken, kept his word, and done his best to be a truly dutiful man. Yet, Robert’s shadow is a rather large one and people tend to believe scandalous behavior over honorable acts.

Gravely, Stannis realizes he needs to stop this friendship with Sansa. Calling it a friendship was an odd summary, but Sansa had just call them friends the day before. Robert was right, he wasn’t really one for friends. He cares for Sansa as he assumes friends do. They send texts throughout the day, something that Robert and Renly do with other people. They eat lunch together sometimes. Friends do that too. Stannis grimaces. While it may be a friendship in the true definition, he doesn’t necessarily have platonic feelings for Sansa. He scoffs at his own thoughts not necessarily platonic . The other day when he stopped by the hospital, Stannis caught himself staring at Sansa’s breasts for far longer than was appropriate. Stannis spends a moment wonderng what length of time is actually socially acceptable to stare at your friend’s chest.

Stannis loosens his tie and picks up his phone. He is finding that when Sansa crosses her mind, it is easier just to text her or call her. He sends a few texts in a row letting Sansa know about his conversation with Robert. She doesn’t immediately respond so Stannis starts reviewing a contract but every few paragraphs, his eyes shift to his phone.

Eventually, Sansa calls him. She seems odd on the phone, almost hesitant about the conversation. It’s an odd feeling, wanting to talk to her but also hating that for whatever reason he seems to be causing her distress. Sansa sighs into the phone and says she knows they have to stop spending time together thanks to all these “old biddies” who don’t know how to mind their own business. Stannis reassures Sansa that he has no intention of stopping their friendship for idle gossip who “have the bad taste to sleep with Robert and gossip about a perfectly harmless friendship.”

He can practically hear Sansa smile on the phone. They agree that from now on, they'll choose more discreet eating establishments. Stannis confides that his meeting in the morning went well. She’s not surprised but congratulates Stannis for it. He feels an odd sense of pride and smiles back. They talk about Sansa's plans for the rest of the night. She’s staying in and reading her magazines. Stannis can’t help but smile. Sansa is a smart, hard-working woman yet she loves those ridiculous magazines with the articles about diets, fashion, and female orgasms. Stannis shares he is helping Shireen with her book report tonight. Then somehow the plan shifts. Stannis will buy a few steaks at the deli down the street. Sansa has some corn and beans that she’ll bring over and cook. Together they’ll help Shireen with her book report and then Sansa will make Stannis do all the quizzes in her new magazines.

***

78 Days After

Stannis listens intently as the specialist go over Shireen’s test results. Shireen's hearing test is compared to her hearing test that she was given as a newborn and the one she was given when she began school. It appears Shireen has a five to seven percent loss of hearing. The audiologist warns that nothing is conclusive, sometimes testers have bad days and one test alone cannot be determinant. Selyse thanks the doctor and leaves the office quickly. She is no doubt heading to the temple to pray.

Jon Arryn walks in and says a brief hello to Stannis. Jon still harbors resentment for Stannis basically shutting down his entire research project and essentially banning Sansa from working at the hospital. Jon tells Stannis that Shireen is asking questions of the nurses upstairs about why she is once again having tests done at the hospital. Stannis grinds his teeth. He’s deeply tired and the sense of dread in the pit of his stomach only grows heavier. Stannis demands to know if Jon or the nurses told Shireen anything. His tone is harsh and there will clearly be repercussions if anyone dared to speak to his child. Jon shoots Stannis an irritated glance. Stannis apologizes to Jon for making the accusation. The air is thick and tense as the two men glare at each other for a moment before Stannis excuses himself.  
Notes:

Each chapter will have a days before (meaning how many days before their breakup) and a days after (meaning this is part is occurring this number of days after the breakup.)


	6. Magazines & Scrabble

100 DAYS BEFORE 

Sansa walks into the penthouse and frowns. Stannis’ car was downstairs in his parking space but neither he nor Shireen were in the living room. The television was off as were most of the lights. She walks into the kitchen and bites her lip. _Where are they?”_ Typically, when Sansa has her late class, Shireen and Stannis cook dinner and are waiting for her when she gets home. But now everyone seems missing. 

Sansa hangs up her book bag on the hanger and rolls her neck, trying to relax her muscles. She really hates Thursday because of her anatomy lab. Its four hours of absolute torture. Sure there are dead bodies everywhere, but honestly that is the only part of the class Sansa doesn’t mind. The teacher is horrid and rude, the putrid smell of the dead bodies and chemicals permeates her skin and hair, and the class is in the morgue meaning the room is absolutely freezing. She always takes a shower in the bathrooms of the hospital because she is always so cold and smells so bad afterwards. It makes her even later getting home which typically means she is just in a worse mood. Sansa calls out to Shireen twice and starts searching around. She spots the scrabble board out on the dining room table and cocks her head to the side. Stannis is a bigger clean freak than she is and he would never just leave out a board game with the tiles. 

Sansa starts to clean it up when she realizes it was purposefully let out. There are vertical tiles spelling at the word “NAKED”. There is a horizontal word coming down from the “N” making the letter “NOW” and another words shoots up from the “D” making the word “BED”. 

Sansa’s eyes light up as she looks towards the stairs. Clearly, Shireen was not at the penthouse and wouldn’t be back for a while. Sansa kicks off her sandals and starts unbuttoning her shirt. She makes it to the bedroom and stops to look around. There are several candles lit around the room and there is a fire going in the hearth. There is a large gathering of purple and white roses in a vase on the side table. They are her favorite flowers and very much out of season. They probably cost Stannis a small fortune. The bed has rose petals sprinkled around the bed and scrabble tiles laying on her pillow. Sansa reads “I ADORE YOU” spelled out. Sansa bites her lip again. Despite his protests, Stannis really is the sweetest man in all of Westeros. Soft orchestra music starts playing from the bathroom. Sansa slowly walks to the ensuite and pushes the door open. Stannis is standing by the bathtub in his black terrycloth robe. The bathtub is full with a few rose petals in the water and a few more scattered on the floor. There are at least a dozen candles lit and Sansa just stares at Stannis for a long moment. _He remembered_

Stannis reminds Sansa that she’s supposed to be naked. She wants to tell Stannis that she loves him, that he’s the best thing that ever happened to her. Instead she smiles at him and lets her shirt fall from her shoulders. A few seconds later, her pants go too. Sansa blushes lightly when she reaches behind her to unhook her bra. It’s a navy bra which lacks sparkle and lace but he looks enthralled all the same. They share a soft smile when the material falls to the ground. Stannis’ eyes leave hers and travel down her chest. _He is such a boob guy._ She loves when they are like this, alone with all the time in the world. Sansa slowly slips her panties off and lets them pool at her feet. Despite the warmth from the candles, her nipples pucker under the gaze. Stannis doesn’t move, save for his eyes which continue to roam up and down her body. She lets out a heavy breath of air. He hasn’t touched her yet and she’s becoming wet with arousal.

For a while, his eyes focus on the small strip of hair covering her womanhood. He tells her she’s beautiful but doesn’t come any closer. It’s truly maddening being this close to him while naked but not touching him. His eyes move on. They slowly inspect her knees, her ankles, her arms, then her neck. 

When Stannis’ gaze slowly moves to her face, his eyes are hazy with emotion and candlelight. He tells her she’s beautiful and repeats the phrase he spelt out on the bed. His voice is strong but quiet, almost reverent. Her eyes sparkle at his words and turn a deeper shade of blue. 

Sansa wants to beg Stannis to undo his robe. She can see his erection through the thick material and he’s half hard. Instead, Stannis hands her a hair clip. Sansa puts hair in a messy bun. As Sansa lifts her arms, her breasts push forward and upwards and Stannis groans at the sight. He finally leans over to flick one of her nipples with his thumb, enjoying the way she pushes against his hand. He leans into her body and whispers into her ear. 

“Get in the tub,” Stannis demands. She loves when he uses that business tone with her, so decisive and strong. She whimpers because she’d rather be touching him but does as he instructs. The water is steaming hot and smells of jasmine and roses. Stannis takes a vial of liquid and pours it into the tub. The water becomes slippery and Sansa’s skin shines from the oils. Stannis unties the robe and steps into the bathtub behind Sansa. It takes a moment for both of them to get comfortable. His legs press against hers and one of his arms wraps around her waist. Sansa leans back against him and sighs in complete and utter bliss. The water and Stannis feel wonderful. The tension in her body melts away. An Stannis seems to relax as well, all but one part of him. 

Stannis reaches over and grabs a small bowl. Inside, there are strawberries, peaches, and whip cream. He plucks a berry up, scoops the white cream and offers it to Sansa. He feeds berries one at a time, kissing her neck and the back of her shoulders between bites. Juice spills down the corner of Sansa’s mouth and Stannis leans forward to lick it off. She moans at the feeling of his rough tongue on her chin. Sansa presses her legs together thinking about how his tongue felt licking the rest of her body. She tells him as much and he squeezes her breast in response. His caresses are slow, in no real hurry or order. It’s an odd and sensual experience for Stannis to be unable to see Sansa’s body while he’s touching her. She leans her back against his chest enjoying his touch. His finger travels down her arm slowly, under the water and down to her wrist. Stannis draws lazy circles on her hand then repeats the action along her hip. She giggles when his finger dips into her belly button and moans when he takes a floating rose petal and rubs it across her naked skin. The petal is velvety soft. Water sloshes about, as her legs move apart slightly; his hands explore her wet folds, stroking up and down against the seam of her womanhood. She feels his erection against her back and slowly grind her backside against him. Her legs move further apart, over Stannis’ own as a clear hint of what she wants. Far too slowly for her liking, Stannis takes one finger and parts her lower lips. Stannis finds the hot water of the bath and Sansa’s slickness confounding. His thumb, with the petal over it, finds the round nub above her folds and begins to make lazy circles while one finger moves inside of her. Stannis keeps his timing slow but steady. In a low voice, he tells her how utterly beautiful she is right now. He tells her how much he loves when she comes on his fingers, how much he loves to watch her come apart and know he’s the reason for it. Sansa moans loudly and presses herself into his hand. They both know she loves it when he talks to her like this, encouraging her and telling her what she does to him. When her orgasm starts, Sansa’s nails dig into Stannis’ leg and moans his name loudly. He kisses the back of her neck and lets her enjoy the pleasant haze for a few moments. His arms wrap fully around her and their fingers entwine in front of her. 

He tells her they have the whole night. Shireen is having a sleepover with Myrcella. The two talk briefly about dinner. He’s got two steaks marinating right now but if she prefers, they can order takeout. They help each other get out of the bathtub. 

She licks the water droplets of Stannis’ chest before leaning up to kiss his mouth. Stannis’ tongue enters her mouth searching Sansa’s. Their bodies rub against each other, soft against hard. Sansa breaks the kiss long enough to thank him for all of this. It must have taken him a long time between the flowers and the candles and the tiles and the fruit. It isn’t her nameday or their anniversary or anything special. 

Stannis hands go to cup her ass, kneading them and enjoying the way she presses her against him. He doesn’t need a reason to do something special for her, she’s the reason. 

Sansa leans up to kiss Stannis again and asks whether he wants to be standing or sitting when she takes his cock in her mouth. His eyes widen with surprise and arousal before pointing to the bedroom. 

***

1 DAY AFTER

Stannis swallows hard. Sansa’s face is red and wet with tears and confusion. His heart breaks as Sansa yells out for him to “stop it.” In a heartbroken voice, Sansa begs Stannis to just tell her the truth. She takes a step towards him and Stannis takes another step back. _Why won’t she just fucking listen? This is hard enough as it is._ Stannis tells her again that things just aren’t working out. She’s in medical school, he’s a divorcee with physical custody of a ten year old. He works long hours and her residency will begin in two years. There is a seventeen year age difference between them. 

Sansa shakes her head again and repeats that she loves Stannis and Stannis loves her. She begs Stannis to just tell her what is really going on and stop whatever he is doing. They go around in circles. She cries in front of him insisting that he would never do this, something else is going on. He insist that it’s just not the right time, its better this way. She’s still too young to commit herself to him and he’s just now getting out of a marriage. She cries more and he becomes increasingly tempted to just tell her the whole awful truth. Apparently Sansa senses him cracking too. She walks closer and kisses him. It catches Stannis off guard and he can’t help but respond back. He lets himself linger in her embrace for a little too long, trying to memorize her taste and her feel. She taste like lemon and tears and home. 

Gently, Stannis breaks the kiss. He looks into her eyes, which are pooling with tears and hope. Stannis stiffens his back and his resolve. _This is the best thing for Sansa and Shireen. I can’t straddle her with a sick child, endless hospital visits, months of stress and worry, tests and results. She has school, she has years of hard work ahead of her. I can’t let her sacrifice her life and her career so I have someone to lean on. It isn’t fair, it isn’t right. I can’t live with myself if I did that to her._ Stanns blurts out that he and Selyse are giving it another shot. Sansa recoils from him and shakes her head. He’s lying and she knows it. Sansa spits out “what?” and Stannis immediately regrets his choice words but it is too late now. Stannis begins mixing truth with the lies he has created in his head. 

Stannis says he went to Selyse the day before yesterday, he drove to Dragonstone to see her. _That part is true_ Sansa looks confused and taken aback, her arms wrap around her body, trying to protect herself from his words. His story begins to veer into falsehoods. Stannis begins saying that he’s been missing Selyse recently. They are the same age and have been together for years. She’s able to understand him in ways that Sansa doesn’t. They have a child, they have history. Sansa’s cheeks turn red with anger and her eyes loose some of their usual sparkle. She inhales a deep breath and fresh tears fall down her face. 

Stannis knows he needs to just end this quickly. He calls her a “great girl” and insists it has been “a great ride” but his life is Selyse and Shireen. He apologizes for leading her on but they both knew what _this_ is. It’s an affair, an affair that went too far and went on for too long. “You’re just so wonderful, so beautiful, that I let myself get wrapped up in all of this, but we both knew it wasn’t a long term relationship.” He intends to fix his marriage and knows Sansa will be able to move on quickly. 

She starts to cry harder and Stannis grips the chair to keep himself from breaking down. Sansa looks utterly defeated, utterly devastated and he hates himself for causing her pain. She grabs her purse and practically runs out of the penthouse. He hears the elevator ding and a broken sob comes from the hallway before he’s left with quiet. Slowly, Stannis walks over to the living room couch and sits down. _It’s over. It’s really over._

Stannis feels his heart ache in almost unbearable pain. He nearly gets up a dozen times to run after her but he can’t do that. His eyes scan the room. He spots the vase which Sansa insisted she had to have at the antique shop a few months ago. There are half a dozen pictures of the two of them together, all in different sized frames. Her jacket is still on the hook at the front door and beyond that he spots the Scrabble box laying under one of Sansa’s medical school books. Stannis clinches his jaw. He grabs his car keys and quickly leaves the penthouse. He has no clue where he is going but Stannis knows he can’t stay in the penthouse a moment longer. 

250 DAYS BEFORE 

Stannis scoffs at the question. This magazine quiz must have been written by a complete idiot. Sansa glares at him from across her desk; she was clearly waiting on an answer. Stannis still wasn’t sure how Sansa manages to get him to do these completely ridiculous tests. What kind of question was, “What is your ideal romantic date?”

Stannis grumbles before making his decision. “Fine, I choose C: a long romantic walk on the beach.” Sansa circles his answer and admits she chooses answer A: a long romantic bath for two with rose petals.

Sansa asks another question about whether he prefers: intelligence, beauty, character, or athleticism. Stannis picks intelligence. Sansa surprises him and picks “character.” She explains she wants a man who is trustworthy and stable. She looks at Stannis a split second too long before turning back to her next question. Sansa reveals she finds men with large arms to be super sexy. Stannis reveals his favorite non-erogenous body part are legs. They go back and forth until Sansa announces they are finished with the quiz. According to this stupid magazine, Sansa is attracted to the “sexy and silent type.” Stannis meanwhile is drawn to “traditional beauty.” He declares this quiz to be as useless and idiotic as the last two she’s made him participate in. Sansa just smiles. She loves her silly girl magazines and nothing Stannis says will change that. She steals a piece of broccoli off his plate and continues onto the next article. Stannis grumbles again about stolen food and stupid magazine article but truth be told, there is nowhere else he would rather be.

Sansa informs him the next article is entitled, “Top 10 Tips To Tell if Your Crush Is Interested.” Stannis turns a light shade of pink as Sansa begins reading the so called “tips.” He hopes there isn’t a tip about a potential suitor putting up with stupid magazine articles just because it makes her happy. _That would be a dead giveaway, as would everything else I've been doing recently. ___


	7. Conversations

194 DAYS BEFORE 

Catelyn fold her hands in front of her lap and looks between Stannis and Sansa. In no uncertain terms, neither Catelyn nor Ned approve of this relationship. He's married. He's too old. He has a child. He's married. She's in medical school. She's young. He's still too old. He's still married. Stannis listens to a long list of all the reasons his relationship with Sansa is inappropriate. Catelyn reminds Sansa, “once you are the mistress, you never stop being the mistress.” At that, Sansa turns red and Stannis insists that Catelyn quit speaking to Sansa like that. Stannis doesn’t see Sansa like that.

"Perhaps," says Catelyn solemnly, "but it doesn't mean that the rest of the world won't view her as a whore." Sansa looks over at her father. Thirty minutes ago, Ned had been angry. He threatened to kill Stannis multiple times. Ned had his fist balled up and nearly swung at Stannis. Ned’s voice had been loud and very mad, but hearing Sansa admit she was sleeping with Stannis deflated Ned’s anger and caused Sansa’s father to shrivel up to simpering pathetic version of himself. Sansa decides she’d rather have the angry version as opposed to how her father is acting now.

Catelyn continues the conversation, mainly speaking to Stannis. She wants to know the status of his marriage. His attorneys started divorce proceedings weeks agoStannis admits he’s made Selyse a very generous settlement offer. Selyse and he haven’t lived together for years. Shireen will continue to split her time between King’s Landing and Dragonstone, just as she has done for the last several years. 

Catelyn's eyes narrow. "Is that how you justify what you've done? You abandoned your wife for the city, take her child with you and make my daughter your whore. But that's acceptable because Selyse stayed behind in Dragonstone?" 

Sansa sighs loudly and tells her mother to stop. Everyone in the room knows that Stannis did not abandon his wife. If anything, Selyse chose her religion over her husband and child. Sansa shoots another glance at her father. Ned looks practically catatonic. They sit in uncomfortable silence for several minutes. Sansa offers her parents tea or a snack. No one bothers responding. Another moment of silence passes. Stannis admits he's made mistakes, many of them but insists that Sansa is not one of them. Sansa softly smiles at him and Ned sees the exchange. 

"Stop looking at him like that," orders Ned in a whine. Sansa wants to laugh at her father's reaction, she's never seen him act so much like a four year old before. Any thoughts of laughing die when she sees her mother’s expression; Catelyn’s face shows disappointment, disapproval, anger, and panic.

Eventually Cat asks to speak with her daughter alone which leaves Ned and Stannis by themselves. Twenty minutes later, Sansa returns to the living room. It’s evident she's been crying. Sansa walks over to Stannis’ side. He takes her hand and grips it in his; he leans over to kiss her temple and whisper to her. Sansa's mother leaves without another word but her father stays behind. With a warning look Ned tells Stannis, "If you hurt her, I will kill you." Ned leans over and kisses Sansa's cheek, the one furthest away from Stannis. He tells her he loves and will call her over the weekend.

After Ned leaves, Sansa wraps her arms around Stannis holds him tightly. Eventually Sansa pulls back enough to kiss him sweetly. A tear runs down her face and Stannis wipes the lone tear with his thumb. "That could have been worse," Sansa admits through her tears. It seems insane to Stannis that Sansa is trying to see the positive in her parents finding out about them. 

Sansa leans into his arms again and he envelopes her in his arms. Stannis has never been one to like hugs but has found Sansa craves this sort of physical affection. Against his arm, Sansa admits her mother is very unhappy. Stannis smiles against her neck. He promised Ned that he would never hurt Sansa and would never make her sad. Stannis swore he’d always eat Sansa’s burnt toast, buy her whatever she wanted, encourage her in medical school, never interfere with her studies, and ensure that she’s always happy and secure in their relationship. 

Her hot breath tickles his ear. "He didn’t make you promise to do all the magazine quizzes with me from now on?" 

Stannis scoffs, pretending to be annoyed, "That would have been a deal breaker, I adore you but those quizzes are the most idiotic things I’ve ever read.” 

Sansa lets out a small laugh and leans to her side so she can kiss him. He wants to know how he can help Sansa and offers again to end this, if their relationship is causing her too much grief. Sansa kisses his neck and tells him that she isn’t going anywhere. 

***

91 DAYS BEFORE 

Shireen lets out an exasperated sound. Sansa and Stannis break apart and Shireen makes a gagging sound. Stannis leans in to kiss Sansa one more time before departing for his business dinner, cutting his eyes at Shireen. Twenty minutes later a pizza arrives; it’s full of fatty meats and cheeses. The ladies scarf down two pieces each while they discuss their plans for Stannis' nameday. Obviously, he'll want to go to Storm's End. Nearly every weekend since Weirdwood Day, the three of them have gone to the beach and stayed at the cabin. Shireen insists that they make him a cake to which Sansa makes a face. Stannis doesn't like sweets. He prefers salads to desserts. Shireen shares is true most of the time except for one dessert. “He loves fruitcake.” Sansa rolls her eyes _He would like fruitcake. _. Stannis will want to be on the boat for a large portion of the weekend, so they plan a picnic to one of the islands off the coast. They pick out his favorite foods and pull their presents out of their hiding spots. They wrap the boxes quickly and split another piece of pizza.__

Soon it’s after 8:00. Sansa pulls out her chemistry book and Shireen pulls out the chapter book she's been reading. Twenty minutes in, they decide they want chocolate chip cookies. While the cookies bake, they should really read more. Instead, they decide to paint their toenails. Sansa paints hers bright pink and then helps Shireen with her deep blue color. Then Shireen asks about makeup. Sansa says Shireen is too young and too pretty for that stuff. The little girl frowns and lowers her eyes. She’s looks so much like her father in that moment that it nearly takes Sansa’s breath away. When the oven timer goes off, Shireen excuses herself claiming she doesn’t feel well. Sansa feels her heart sink into her stomach as Shireen walks away clearly upset. 

Twenty minutes later, Sansa knocks on Shireen's door and asks to come in. Sansa brushes Shireen's hair out of her eyes and hugs her when she starts to cry. Shireen starts saying that she’s not beautiful: her ears are too big and her jaw is too big. Shireen points to the side of her face and neck and starts to cry harder. The grey scale scars are still prominent. Sansa starts to understand and tells Shireen all the things that are beautiful about her. She has her father's deep blue eyes and the perfect lady-like nose. Her hair is a lovely shade of brown and her smile lights up her whole face. As for the scars, they just show everyone what a fighter and survivor Shireen is. "You survived a disease that most other people die from." Sansa tries to make Shireen better by telling her how the boys used to all make fun of her for her red hair and very pale skin. 

"But you are pretty," insists Shireen. Unsaid in the sentence is "I will never be.”

Sansa hugs the little girl and promises her that she truly does believe that Shireen is pretty. Shireen asks about makeup again and Sansa sighs heavily. Sansa says she'll talk to Stannis but ultimately, it will be her parents’ decision. Shireen is still very young and women spend their entire adult lives worried about their looks; she wants the little girl to avoid that for a little while longer. They share a hug before hurrying back to the living room to eat the cookies. 

After Shireen goes to sleep, Sansa spends nearly an hour researching organic makeup and face washes that would be appropriate for her age. Stannis is unlikely to be okay with the makeup thing and Selyse even less so. Still, Sansa knows how hard it is for any kid at that age much less for someone like Shireen with physical scars and a natural shyness.

It’s nearly midnight when Stannis walks in, already taking off his jacket and unbuttoning his shirt. His jaw throbs, his head hurts and he’s absolutely exhausted. He’s surprised to see Sansa waiting up for him, with her reading glasses on top of her head and her _comfy_ pajamas on. Stannis knows from experience that the comfortable pajamas are worn when Ssana’s either on her womanly cycle or when she’s expecting someone other than he and Shireen to stop by. 

Stannis knows he’s got a good week and half before Sansa’s cycle comes and considering the late hour, he’s relatively sure no one is stopping by. He notices the crumbs of cookies on a plate and the empty pizza box on the table. Sansa says something about gaining three pounds tonight and rubs her stomach before moving over to give Stannis plenty of room on the couch. Quickly, Sansa tells Stannis about the conversation she and Shireen had earlier. Stannis wants to say no immediately but can’t quite compel himself to do so. His heart breaks for his daughter and he knows damn well that without Sansa being around, Shireen would have never vocalized her feelings. He spends thirty minutes looking at websites Sansa has found including ones with all natural ingredients. Stannis spends at least ten minutes trying to figure out the difference between: liquid foundation, powder foundation, and concealer. _Did women really use all this stuff?_

Stannis knows he’s going to cave in but is sure Selyse will throw a fit. Instead of worry about the fight ahead of him, he focuses on Sansa cuddling up to him. Sansa tries to talk about his business meeting but Stannis has other plans. He throws Sansa over his shoulder giggles. She compliments his ass from her angle. Stannis smirks as he carries Sansa into the bedroom and deposits her on the bed. In Robert’s words, Stannis realizes he’s going to get laid despite the comfy pajamas.

*** 

154 DAYS AFTER 

Sansa walks into the apartment and waves at Margaery. Her blind date wasn’t quite the disaster she expected it to be. He was polite and kind. Perhaps he smiled a bit too much for her liking and he seemed a bit immature despite being two years older than her. Still, Jon Umber was handsome and from the same part of Westeros as she was. It was much more promising than the other setups she’d gone on recently. She still wasn't ready for a real relationship but it was easier to go on a date for two hours than listen to every single person in her life go on and on about how she needed to date. 

Sansa expects Margaery to ask her about how everything went but instead she finds her roommate looking at an uncharacteristic loss for words. Margaery starts to speak several times but stops herself. Nervously, she brushes her hair behind her ears. Sansa thinks she is braced for whatever Margaery is about to tell her: borrowed her cashmere sweater, accidentally lost her diamond earrings, busted pipes in the bathroom. Whatever was the matter couldn't be that bad. 

The brunette takes her hand out and places it on Sansa's leg. Its meant to be reassuring but it just makes Sansa nervous. "There's no easy way to say this. Loras called from the hospital." Sansa looks concerned and asks if Renly is okay. Robert? Margaery's grandmother? Margaery nods slowly and seems to be still searching for the words. . Finally, Sansa’s roommate blurts out, “It’s Shireen.” 


	8. The Future & The Others

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First, let me apologize for not updating this in 2 weeks. One of my co-workers had an absolute emergency that sent her half away across the country, so I've been doing her work and mine and let me tell you, 75 work weeks aren't fun but she's back and I've caught up on my sleep! So enjoy and I should be back to posting 2-3 times a week. As always, comments are welcome and appreciate!

171 DAYS BEFORE

Stannis sits on one side of the long wooden table, an attorney on each side. Across the table sits Selyse with her own lawyers. They were nearly two hours into their negotiations and it felt like things were finally moving in the right direction, to to speak. Selyse's bald attorney announces early in the proceedings that the way for a quick and clean divorce was for Stannis to agree to several "minor details." 

The first _minor detail_ according to Seylse's attorney is that Stannis continues to pay spousal support for the next twenty years irregardless of whether Selyse remarried. At that, Stannis' raises an eyebrow. Selyse never seemed interested in being married to him and it catches him off guard to hear she would consider marrying again.

Secondly, Selyse wants the deed to Dragonstone outright as well as their investment properties in the Reach. Stannis has no issue with Selyse getting the home, he and he intended that to be part of the settlement. Stannis always found the place too big and too cold for his taste. It is much too far away from King's Landing for practicality and he hasn't lived there in years. As for the condos in the Reach, that catches Stannis off guard. Years ago, Stannis invested nearly a quarter of a million bronze dragons in a luxury development of condos and hotels. At the time, Selyse felt it was a wasteful investment but apparently the yearly profits on the property had changed Selyse's mind. It was a hefty amount of money but it was nothing compared to Baratheon's shipping and merchant holdings. Just last year, both he and Robert were listed as two of the richest ten men in Westeros. 

The third demand is Shireen inherits at least 50% of Stannis' Baratheon stock, no matter if he re-marries and/or has more children. 

Selyse gives him a cold look, “I want to ensure Shireen doesn’t get forgotten in case your mistress gets pregnant _accidentally_.” Stannis grinds his teeth in annoyance. Selyse's other attorney, the female with far too much makeup on, readjusts her chair and clears her voice. The attorney insists that Mrs. Baratheon is, "just concerned for the welfare of her only child." 

Stannis bites back his indignation and says nothing for a moment. Sansa would never become pregnant on purpose to trap him. It was absolutely ridiculous, but he did not want to fight with Selyse right now. The quicker he and Selyse could get through this, the quicker this whole ordeal would be over. 

Right now, Shireen stands to inherit everything of his anyways, including 100% of his stock. Stannis makes a mental note to look at changing his will once the divorce is final. Sansa's family has money and in a few years, Sansa will be a resident and in less than seven years will be a full pledged doctor. She didn't need the money but he wanted to ensure she could live the life she wanted if gods forbid something should happen to him.

Lastly, Selyse wants Stannis responsible for paying for all of Shireen’s private tuition and for all college expenses. Selyse agrees all their bank accounts can remain separate and their cars will remain their own. Stannis tries not to roll his eyes at one. He was the one who believed in higher education. He'd taught Shireen to read small words before she began school. They share a love of history and books while Selyse never encouraged Shireen's learning and education. The only thing Selyse ever encouraged Shireen to read was religious texts about the Lord of Idiotic Light. 

Stannis grinds his teeth in response. Stannis has no problem with any of the terms but lets his attorneys negotiate. They begin to discuss custody. Selyse wants Shireen for her entire summer break and every other weekend. Stannis scoffs with an angry "like hells" before his attorney shushes him.

Five hours later, both he and Selyse sign on the dotted line for their official separation agreement. Selyse gets Dragonstone outright and will receive spousal support for seven years or until she remarries, whichever comes first. Additionally, Selyse will received 100,000 silver dragons in a lump sum payment once the divorce is final. The investment properties in the Reach will be put in trust for Shireen once she obtains the age of twenty one. Until then, the profits and investments will be evenly divided between he and Selyse. 

Stannis will pay for all of Shireen’s educational endeavors and will leave no less than 34% of his Baratheon stock to Shireen. Stannis will retain physical custody of Shireen and will go visit her mother on the weekends once a month and six weeks during summer break. Selyse will not take Shireen to any religious meetings or temples until she is eighteen years old and agrees to do so on her on accord. Selyse also agrees to not speak publicly about their marriage, this settlement, Stannis, Sansa, or Baratheon Industries. Selyse manages to call Sansa a whore twice before her attorneys shut her up. 

Stannis nods to Selyse as he leaves the office. He assures Selyse that he’ll drop off Shireen next Friday in Dragonstone. She nods in response with a quiet thanks. Logically, the separation agreement isn’t the end. There is still a six month wait before they legally can divorce but something feels very final about all of this. A feeling of regret washes over Stannis. It isn’t regret about the divorce, its regret that they didn’t do this years ago. Both he and Selyse spent years ignoring the hard truths that their marriage needed to end. It was easier to just live separate lives, avoid splitting property, and fighting over custody. 

Stannis walks out of the building and gets into his car. His mind wonders to Selyse’s suggestion that he’d have other children. He and Sansa have spoken about their future as far as two years out when her residency begins. They’ve discussed redecorating the kitchen in the cabin at Storm’s End and their plans for Sansa’s summer break, but they’ve never spoken about marriage or kids in any real capacity. By the time Stannis gets home, he’s already planned out the conversation. He walks into the penthouse and finds Sansa on the deck studying. She's wearing those very small short short that Sansa prances around in and a t-shirt about a blood drive. Sansa moves over in her chair to give Stannis room to sit with her as Stannis relaxes in her arms. 

Stannis tells Sansa about the separation agreement. He leaves out the insinuation that Sansa would get pregnant to trap him and the names Selyse called her. Stannis can tell that Sansa is relieved and feels a little better about the conversation he wants to have. He gives her the basics about property and custody. She seems happy that Shireen “will be us with most of the time".

Stannis then asks what Sansa wants for her future, their future. She seems slightly caught off guard but smiles and asks him the same question without answering his question. 

Stannis contemplates the question and then looks at her. He tells her that the only things that matter to him are Shireen, Sansa, and the company. Reverently, Stannis tells Sansa he loves her. For Sansa, she’s heard those words from him before, but her heart still skips a beat. The both confirm they want their future to be with each other. Sansa doesn’t want to do anything official until she’s done with school. Stannis takes that to mean she doesn’t want an engagement ring until her residency begins but then, but he asks just to clarify. Sansa nods in the affirmative. The divorce will take half a year more and then Sansa wants to give some time for everyone to get used to them.

“Shireen?” asks Stannis trying to figure out who Sansa is seeking approval from. 

“Shireen is one of the few who accepts us. She’s probably not ready for us to get married but she seems okay with us being together. I was actually talking about my parents, my siblings, my uncle Brynden, Robert and Cersei, Jon Arryn, your business associates, my professors, most of my classmates, half of King’s Landing….” 

Stannis interrupts and insists that Robert supports them. 

Sansa smirks, “Robert doesn’t actually approve of our relationship. He’s just fascinated that you are now having as much sex as he is.” 

Stannis frowns. He hates that Sansa’s parents have not fully accepted their relationship. Ned seems more accepting of their relationship now but Catelyn hasn't budged an inch. Cersei is always unpleasant and she’ll never accept anyone in the family who is younger or prettier than her. Sansa's uncle threatened to stop doing business with Baratheon until Sansa talked to him. Some of Sansa's classmates had posted very mean things about her online until his team of lawyers sent them cease and desist letters. Jon Arryn’s response took him by complete surprise. He’d practically challenged Stannis to a duel for Sansa’s honor. 

There are some people on their side so to speak. Like Sansa said, Shireen did support them. Renly supports them as well, as do the younger two Tyrell siblings. His housekeeper made several comments about how much she enjoys Sansa's presence. That should count as well. Stannis isn’t sure why it bothers him that so few approve of his relationship with Sansa. He’s never sought the approval of the masses. Most of King’s Landing are drunks, adulterers, and hypocrites. Still, he doesn’t like for anyone to view Sansa in a negative light or think so little about his relationship with her. Stannis hopes that once the divorce is over, Sansa's friends and family will begin to accept them as a couple. 

Sansa changes the subject to her hours at the free clinic. Sansa couldn't do any medical work on her own but she enjoys basic work like talking to the patient, taking blood pressure and temperatures, and getting to watch the doctors do real work. Shireen soon joins them outside. Stannis fires up the barbecue and they eat hamburgers and grilled vegetables. Sansa comes up behind him and wraps her arms around his torso. She whispers in his ear and asks him if he's really okay. He grunts a reassurance to Sansa and offers her a taste of meat. 

"You sure this is what you want?" asks Sansa, clearly referring to his meeting with Selyse earlier. 

Stannis turns around and looks deep into Sansa's eyes. He tells her that he is happier than he's ever been and he's never been more sure of anything in his whole life.

***

Shireen apologizes for forgetting her laptop and quickly leaves the living room, running to her bedroom. Sansa’s eyes go back to the front door and smiles tentatively at Selyse.

“You’re quiet pretty, just like they say you are.” Selyse’s tone is disapproving and Sansa isn’t quite sure how to respond. Who are _they?_ Pretty is normally a compliment but Sansa knows Selyse means it as anything but one. 

Sansa invites the older woman inside. Selyse is wearing a long grey skirt and faded black shirt with padded shoes like Old Nan wears. The outfit clearly ages the woman fifteen years. Sansa observes the woman quietly as Selyse looks around the living room. She's seen a few picture of Selyse but in person she can tell that Shireen's hair is the exact same as her mother's and they both walk with the same clumsy footing. Selyse had never actually set foot in the penthouse and it seems like she clearly disapproves of the space.

Selyse makes backhand comments about the gaudy chandelier and the bay windows being impractical. Sansa offers tea but Selyse refuses as she won’t be staying long. Sansa offers Selyse a tour but that is rejected as well. Sansa isn’t sure how to respond so she looks down at her folded hands and waits for Shireen to return from her bedroom. _How long does it take to get one dang laptop? _Selyse seems to have the same thought and asks exactly how big this “monstrosity” of a home is.__

“It’s about 3500 square feet inside and about 900 of outdoor space,” Sansa answers knowing her answer would be negatively viewed no matter what she said. From what she knows, Stannis and Selyse home at Dragonstone was five or six times larger than the penthouse and had nearly a hundred acres with it. Instead of bringing that fact up, Sansa decides it is better for her to be nice and say nothing. 

Selyse comments on the leather couches and seems genuinely surprised that Stannis picked them out years before Sansa moved in. Sansa brings up how impressed she has been with Shireen’s cooking and abilities in the kitchen. Selyse nods and admits her daughter’s recent interest in culinary arts has been a pleasant surprise. Twice, Sansa catches Selyse looking at the collection of pictures of Stannis, Shireen, and herself. There is an odd look on Selyse’s face, somewhere between regret and anger.

Shireen comes down with a suitcase and a backpack in hand. The little girl reaches out her arm to give Sansa a hug but Shireen stops herself. Shireen and Selyse leave quickly without a look back. Sansa’s feelings are slightly hurt by Shireen’s lack of goodbye but she understands the predicament the little girl is in. Sansa consoles herself thinking the first face-to-face conversation with Selyse could have been much worse. She wasn’t called a whore or a slut. There was no scene, no outbursts, nothing ugly was said in front of Shireen. 

When Stannis arrives home, Sansa tells him what happened. He groans at Seylse’s comments and mumbles to himself about how he should have been at the penthouse. Sansa shakes her head. Eventually, she’d had to meet Selyse. At least this way, there was no time to be nervous and Stannis being there would have made it even more awkward.

165 DAYS BEFORE

The sunset sinks into the ocean as Sansa wedges herself further in between Stannis’ legs and relaxes her back against his chest. The wind picks up, swirling Sansa’s hair in the air. Their toes play in the sand, her bare legs brushing against his. 

“You have no idea how much I missed you,” Sansa sighs as Stannis wraps his arms tighter around her. Stannis mumbles into her neck. Sansa and Shireen had their spring break on the same week and the three of them decided they wanted to spend their week at the cabin. The three of them were packing their suitcases when Robert called in a panic because the Dornish crate company was bucking at the merger. Stannis insisted that Sansa and Shireen head on to Storm’s End and he’d be there first thing in the morning. Instead, Stannis was stuck in King’s Landing for two more days. Finally at 4:32 pm today, everyone signed onto the contract and Stannis practically ran to the parking lot. 

Stannis and Sansa share a few more minutes of enjoying each other and the beautiful view. Stannis loves moments like this, quiet ones where he can just enjoy being alone with Sansa. It amazes him how much he missed Sansa. Frankly it was scary how much she meant to him and how mu 

They both turn their heads when they hear a booming voice. They both spot Robert wobbling along the sand with a beer in one hand and his shoes in the other. Stannis groans in irritation and annoyance. He had just left Robert in King's Landing a few hours ago. _Why did Robert come up here? on a random Monday afternoon?_ Robert makes his way down the shore yelling about the piss poor ale that the housekeeper left in the fridge. Before either can object, Robert invites himself to the cozy dinner that Stannis, Sansa, and Shireen were planning. 

Stannis grinds his teeth throughout dinner. Robert proceeds to drink Sansa’s favorite wine insisting that Sansa doesn’t need the wine anymore. Then Robert eats the largest piece of salmon and takes up most of the conversation at dinner. He makes inappropriate comments on Joffrey’s newest girlfriend until Stannis orders him to cease. Sansa and Shireen talk about what they've done so far on their short vacation. It sounds like a whole lot of shopping in local boutiques and sitting outside. 

Robert downs another large gulp of wine and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. Stannis cringes and mentally counts backwards from twenty. Shireen excuses herself to get the dessert she’d made. Robert heads to the kitchen claiming he will help his niece. In reality, Robert is going to refill his wine glass.

While they are alone, Sansa whispers to Stannis if he can behave himself, he’ll get a _present_ tonight. Stannis’s eyes grow wide with understanding. He already knew he was getting sex. After all, he’d been without Sansa for three days and they both enjoyed sex quite a lot. But the word _present_ means Sansa’s mouth was going to be on his cock soon. Stannis huffs out a bit of air. He'd gone years without sex but having it all the time and then it suddenly stopping even for a few days was difficult. Hell, right now he felt like a sexually frustrated teenager. He’s also frustrated that Robert is interrupting what would otherwise be a calm and relaxing dinner. 

Sansa leans over to kiss Stannis’ pout away as the kitchen door swings open. Robert makes a sound as if he was gagging and then begins to laugh all over again. The four sit back down and enjoy the the lavender and lemon tart, even Stannis who doesn’t like confections. 

After dinner, the group of four take their place on the living room couches. It is there that Robert brings up the divorce settlement and how quickly matters were taken care. Shireen’s eyes dart downward and Stannis tells Robert to quit talking. Robert merely shrugs and says he thinking about names. “It will have to start with an _S_ of course. I prefer Steffon, Samwell, or perhaps use Stark? Many women are using their maiden name as given names for their children. For a girl, I rather like Stefannie. I knew a girl by that name once, she had an ass that would make the worst criminal repent…” 

Before Robert can go on, Stannis interrupts. “What in the living hells are you talking about?”

Robert smiles and admits he knows it isn’t public knowledge but he’s thrilled that Sansa is pregnant. Stannis spits out his water and goes ashen, Sansa jumps up out of her chair and Shireen’s gaze goes straight to Sansa’s stomach. There is a long pause before Stannis and Sansa begin yelling at Robert. After a few moments, Robert throws his hands up in the air and realizes he’s very much mistaken. “I just thought Sansa was knocked up based on fast the settlement went,” Robert explains still holding his hands up in defeat.

Shireen asks to be excused and doesn’t wait for permission. Sansa is bright red and looks quite upset as well. Being as quiet as Stannis can muster, he demands Robert leave the cabin at once and “go back to King’s Landing.” Robert looks just like a little boy and sticks out his lip. Sansa can’t help but think how much Robert looks like Stannis right now. Under Robert’s weight and past the jaw, they really do have a remarkable resemblance. Robert spits out a sincere apology and leaves, promising to be gone in the morning. 

Sansa watches as Stannis paces the floor for countless minutes. He mutters of Robert’s idiotic notions and how much Robert upset Shireen. Stannis grinds his teeth as he walks around the chairs and past the bookshelf. He starts to speak of how Robert was the whole reason he was days late for his vacation and now Robert is trying to ruin the rest of the vacation. 

It takes nearly half an hour to calm down Stannis. Then he goes upstairs to speak to Shireen. Eventually Sansa joins them and they have a very long and uncomfortable conversation. They both assure the girl that Sansa is not pregnant. Shireen nods and admits she is glad but has other questions. She wants to know if and when they plan to marry. Shireen asks how many kids they want to have and if they will all have to move to some far off land for Sansa’s residency. Stannis admits that Sansa's residency is a big question but that is two years from now. As for the kids, they both say they don't have the answer to that right now. Shireen asks if there will be a prenuptial contract at which case Sansa reddens again. Stannis says "no" to that but promises that she will be well taken care of for the rest of her life.

Eventually, the conversation ends with hugs and a few tears. Stannis finally falls into bed well after midnight; his jaw clinches again when he realizes that Sansa is already asleep. _Another thing Robert ruined tonight._

***

154 DAYS AFTER 

Sansa exhales loudly as she stops running. Less than twenty minutes ago, Margaery had given her the news of Shireen and her illness. Everything was very vague but it sounded serious, particularly if Loras was there. Margaery insisted on driving but Sansa couldn't wait to park so she'd jumped out at the closet intersection. Due to the late hour, there is no one at reception to lead her in the right direction. The children's hospital has eight floors and four wings per floor. The first and second were for short term stays and injuries like pneumonia and multiple broken bones. The fifth floor was generally for neonatal ICU and children under one years old. Quickly Sansa hits the button for the third floor but the elevator takes too long so she runs up several flights of stairs. Sansa rushes to the main waiting area but only sees a few strangers huddled together in a corner. She runs to the nurses' station and finds a woman she vaguely recognizes from the free clinic. The nurse named Ronyda shoots her a sympathetic look and leans in close clearly knowing why Sansa is there. "She's on the sixth floor under the last name Theon." 

Sansa shoots her a bewildered expression, then quickly thanks the nurse before heading back to the stairs. Sansa slows as she approaches the nurses station on the sixth floor and swallows. She had only seen Shireen once in the last six months but she still loved that little girl. She spent more time with Shireen than either one of her parents did: Stannis due to business and Selyse due to choice. Sansa really thought that she'd would be in Shireen's life forever but clearly that was not meant to be. She couldn't bear it if something was actually wrong. The nurse pointed to a set of closed double doors but warns Sansa that visiting hours are over. 

Sansa nods and slowly walks through the doors. The wing is eerily quiet as she walks past the solid wood doors with names she'd didn't recognize. Her heart stops when she sees the last name _Theon_ on the fifth door. Slowly, Sansa walks pushes the door opening, doing all she can to be quiet. She sees Shireen looking very small and pale on the bed and can't help but feel the tears fall down. Shireen's asleep and the only sound in the room is the beeps and wheezing of various machines. Sansa nearly gets to the foot of the bed before she spots Stannis asleep in a recliner chair. Sansa stands still to let her pupils widen so she can see better in the dark. Stannis looks exhausted and even though he's asleep he looks tense. It seems odd that she's this physically close to him after all this time. Her eyes trace Stannis' outstretched arm to see his hand on the bed, holding Shireen's. 

Sansa manages to tear her eyes away from Shireen and Stannis and looks at the far wall. There are drawings and get well cards from Tommen and a few of her classmates from school. There are pictures of Shireen with Stannis, her cousins, one with Selyse, one of Shireen in a hospital bed with both her parents that appears recent. There's even a picture of she and Shireen from some weekend at the cabin. A stark realization hits Sansa. _Shireen has been in the hospital a while, longer than just a few days ._

Sansa looks back to the bed and brushes her tears away as they keep falling. She notices the hard plastic health chart on the foot of the bed and leans forward. With shaky hands she grabs the chart and begins to read. Word jump out at Sansa as she begins flipping through the pages. She nearly drops the plastic binder when she hears her name being whispered by a familiar voice. She turns to the chair and sees two deep blue eyes looking back at her. She swallows harshly as Stannis stands up and motions for Sansa to go out in the hallway. Sansa slowly follows Stannis into the lighted hallway. Sansa hears him ask her a few questions about why she is there and who told her about Shireen. It all seems fuzzy, almost like she's under water and very far away from were she is standing. _Shireen's been sick for a while and he didn't even have the decency to call me and tell me? Now he's mad at me because I know?_ Stannis says something to her but all Sansa hears is a loud _THWACK_ a split second before she feels is her hand stinging. Its only when Stannis' head snaps slightly to the right that she realizes she' s just slapped him. 

**Author's Note:**

> Each chapter will have a days before (meaning how many days before their breakup) and a days after (meaning this is part is occurring this number of days after the breakup.)


End file.
